The older I get, the more painful it is to remember them.
Before the birth of my son, I experienced two miscarriages.
At the time, I took solace that the babies wouldn’t have felt much pain, if any. My doctor told me that they were probably not attached well and if they didn’t pass then they would probably have been born with issues and challenges.
And then we had our son. The night I became pregnant I lay on my back, my knees and hips in the air, for about 30 minutes after sex. I wanted to make sure this baby was attached to my uterine wall. I really wanted this baby. I also said that if I had another miscarriage I wouldn’t try for another pregnancy.
It stuck. Literally.
And we now have four grown children who are amazing contributors to this great earth.
So I am awesomely blessed and so fulfilled, but occasionally I am reminded of the little ones who didn’t join us here in this life. I selfishly wonder what they would have brought to our lives. And what they would have done with theirs.